I never expected to be so thankful for my Personal Progress. I guess I always thought of it as a task to complete; I never considered that it could really change me.
I'm not as far as I'd like to be in my P.P. I try and do two value experiences a week.....it sometimes seems like too much, but most of the values are easy to do; I guess the two that have made the most difference were in Good Works and Divine Nature.
I started the first value experience in Good Works on January 3rd. It was a challenge to, for two weeks, notice the small, unnoticed, taken for granted, and even secret things that my family members do. So that Tuesday night, I brought up the idea of "Secret Kindnesses". On Wednesday morning, everyone (besides Dad, who was already at work) drew names. It was pretty amazing to see how excited the kids were to try and be sneaky about doing something kind for their lucky person. I remember Josh when he came upstairs after I helped Mimi make Mom and Dad's bed (she got Dad). He was giggling. I asked him what he was so excited about. "I did Willsie's silverware!" he said with a grin. It made me smile to see Josh so happy that he had helped William.
Unfortunately, as the days wore on, "Secret Kindnesses" lost their secrecy and devotion. So I came up with a solution a few days ago. What we have now is a chart with 77 boxes. I took some time to write everyone's names (besides Little Miss Elza) 11 times.....that took awhile. Then I folded up all the names, put them in a jar, and explained the rules of this "game". You're allowed to draw up to two names at once, although you don't have to. If you do something nice for someone in secret, whether for the drawn person or not, you get to mark off a box. If all the boxes have been filled in by the end of the month, then we get a treat. Mom suggested a pizza party (yay!). So far, we have 59 boxes filled in.....only 58 more to go :)
I started the third value experience for Divine Nature on the 5th of January. It was a challenge in which I was supposed to pick one person in my family and try to strengthen our relationship for two weeks. So who did I pick? Well, of course I decided I would try and work on everyone's relationship at the same time! By day two, I realized that this brilliant idea wasn't about to go as planned. So here's my journal entry for that day:Friday, 6 January 2012
Okay, it IS supposed to be a two week thing. Today I'll work on Mimi. That DOES mean that I'll have to finish my schools and chores early, though.
Naturally, I didn't finish my school and chores early. But I did work on our friendship during the following days. It was almost strange how it all worked. I did my best to focus on Mimi, and it worked. It was a lot easier to control my normally UN-controllable temper (and no comments on that, please ;). When I felt too lazy to help her with something as simple as getting something out of the fridge, I would reflect for a moment on all the fights I've had with her about similar things, such as opening a box (yeah, I know, pretty ridiculous, huh?), doing her hair.....and then for one more moment, I'd ask myself, "Do I really want to get in a fight about an oversize bottle of mayo?" When you think about it, is there even a point in an argument like that?
This is another journal entry:
Monday, 9 January 2012
What I've been starting to do is hold back my temper (and my laziness) and just help Mimi for less than 30 seconds. Of course, it's not always Mimi who I'm helping. A lot of the time, Willsie gets hurt, so he screams his head off for Arnica. It's great that he wants Arnica, but his screaming drives me crazy. You'd think that someone was attacking him, or something.
At times like that, it's very difficult to swallow my anger and frustration. But when I take a minute to think about it, is it worth it to yell at him to calm down? He's not going to calm down if you yell at him or ignore him, so what's the point? It's just easier to get the Arnica (and sometimes a band-aid) and be done with it.
Here's one last journal entry:
Monday, 16 January 2012
Two weeks is nearing its end, but I'll try and keep up the love. It's really helped. Last night I goofed off with Willsie. I was bouncing him, giving him high-fives...It made me feel really good. I was also goofing off with Mr. J. He was attacking me, so I started tickling him. When he was on the floor, I helped him get up. Then he dropped back down. I called him a dead slug, just to be silly and make him laugh. It worked really well.
It makes me feel light and weightless when I make my family happy...I just want to float away.
I've explained how I've done the experiences; I haven't explained the outcomes yet.
Good Works: This has really helped me to want to do small things for others, even if I get no reward for it. It's very different from how I used to be, and I, for one, am amazed at how helpful I've been. I used to be this helpful, but when I turned 12, things started to go downhill. I'm so thankful that now I can feel good about what I'm doing. Divine Nature: This has changed EVERYTHING! I doubt you can hardly imagine (okay, maybe you can) how much this value has changed me. I'm really not sure if my determination has anything to do with this, but I've been thoroughly finishing my school and chores, consistently getting up early, constantly reading my scriptures every night.....I've even been saying morning prayers, which is becoming a glorious new habit. (I already say bedtime prayers.) Every morning, I try to think of three things that I want to accomplish during that day, and every night, I think of three things that I'm thankful for. I try to think of new things every time, but that tends to get tricky since I've been doing that for months now.I find that I'm a lot more kind and fun to be around, not to mention happy, when I strive to complete my Personal Progress. Like I said before, I never knew that Personal Progress could overwhelm me with so many blessings--I wouldn't give it up for the world.